@dshack8: KiK? Nope. I only joke about divorce. I'm not committed to it actually happening.
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@iRowlf: I'm sorry that I gave your baby a wine cooler. I forgot that I superglued a mustache on him earlier and thought he was of legal age.
@VaguelyFunnyDan: A Russian bomber was intercepted 20 miles from Los Angeles at 5:17am this morning, but no one wants to talk about it 'cause I made it up.
@ImLeslieChow: I dig, you dig, we dig, she dig, he dig, they dig. Its not a beautiful poem, but its very deep.