@jonnysun: *kills time while waitimg for train*
oh no with time dead the train will never arrive
@wesleybordelon: Standing in the boys clothes section at Kohls waiting for my wife. I just realized I look creepy. Better move to the little girls section.
@robfee: I would watch a reality show that's nothing but goth kids trying not to smile while riding on a jet ski.
@noog: World: Hey check out this sport we made called football.
America: *sips beer* Check out this other sport I just made called football.
@TheTweetOfGod: "Why are all the good ones either married, gay or the Son of God?" - Mary Magdalene.
@YikYakApp: "Someone offered me grapes, but I declined . I'm not used to consuming wine in pill form." — University of Chicago