@TheDizzyBeauty: Kinda creepy that my kids got in a screaming match over which one is my favorite since I don't have any kids.
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@Amusitr0n: If someone's embarrassed just tell them an astronaut did the same thing. For example, "It's ok, Buzz Aldren once shit himself in an Arby's"
@panmidwest: DOG: she keeps using heart emojis when we text DOG FRIEND: which color heart? DOG: *shows friend phone* the gray one DOG FRIEND: omg
@jergarl: When I was a kid I used to ask my my papa... "Whatcha doin?" Papa would say, "I'M MINDING MY OWN DAMN BUSINESS." Best advice ever.