@81I2: Kiss her in the middle of her sentence
chicks dig when you visit them in jail
@alanferrier: Who would have believed that the perfect Wikipedia photo caption could have been improved upon?
@ItsAndyRyan: Me: Is there any particular way you don't want your name pronounced?
Percy: Not per se
@skickwriter: Saying you like a lot of meat in your taco is received differently on Twitter than it is on Facebook.
I know that now.
@Bill_Nye_Tho__: elephants sleep standing up you could be chillin with an elephant and at any moment they could just be like "lmao for sure, g'night"
@XplodingUnicorn: The 9 circles of hell:
1) shopping on Black Friday