@causticbob: kitchen magnet
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@Phoebetate: So I'm still newish around here... What are the rules about Canadians? Does everybody get one? Do I get to choose? Where do I sign up?
@chinty88: I asked 100 women which shampoo they preferred? . . . . . The top ans was . . . . . GET the hell outta of my bathroom!
@afloodofblood: Sometimes I spend so much time on Twitter in the bathroom that I actually pee twice.
@travisauruss: MAN TO LIZARD: "SO I HEAR YOU'RE IN FLOORING SALES" LIZARD: "IM MORE IN PROMOTION" MAN: "WHAT DO YOU DO" LIZARD: "I REP TILE"