@fucpk: *knock knock* whos there? sir theres been an accident. theres been an accident who?
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@mompsychologist: Sorry to all the people my 3yo has yelled at for eating ice cream in a car. Telling him it was illegal was wrong. I know this now.
@adult_keverage: "Stay out of the heat & stay hydrated." Thank you news-anchor. It's my first summer.
@Reverend_Scott: [being carried out of the zoo on a stretcher] not all hyenas are scared of the name Mufasa, I know this now
@DiamondLou69: Is a person diagnosed with a Multiple Personality Disorder able to get a group rate from their therapist? Just asking for some friends.