@bromanconsul: LA girls say they want to go on "adventures" but when I pitch the idea of overthrowing the yakuza they clarify that they meant, like, hiking
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@withanewname: Teacher: We're going to need you to work with your daughter on humility. Me: I was never good with weather stuff but I'll give it a shot.
@thepunningman: "What's that?" I call it a 'knife' "Wow, that's the best thing since bread!" Gregory, I am about to blow your mind