@Scott_A_Gilmore: Ladies, if he says he would go to the "end of the earth" for you and then he goes missing, check Finland.
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@shadygeekdad: Guys, when a woman is mad just tell her she's overreacting. She'll realize you're right and calm right down.
@KenJennings: Dance like no one is threatening to call the police if you don't take your boombox and leave the Christian Science Reading Room immediately.