@mdvaldosta: Ladies: we're not fooled by your PMS trickery. I see how happy you are in those tampon commercials.
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@Faceyspace: HAHA ME AND MY NEW BOYFRIEND QUIT SMOKING TOGETHER NO ONE WILL GET MURDERED FOR SURE.
@meladoodle: Crazy how women have the stereotype of being chatty when 90% of dudes have 45 minute podcasts that no one listens to...
@pinupteacher: [Chaperoning field trip] ME BEFORE WE GO: Only rule is don't lose any kids. AFTER I LOSE A KID: New rule. You're allowed to lose one kid.
@abbycohenwl: -You think I'd make a bad Private Eye 'cause I can't read body language? I will prove you wrong! -Sir, you're talking to the murder victim