@SonOfCha: Last night a burglar broke into my house but I quickly popped open a bag of potato chips & hid in all that free space.
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@JonasPolsky: Getting white carpet installed, then inviting everyone over for a spaghetti sauce and red wine party.
@GreenishDuck: You can lead a horse to water and if he walks on it congratulations you found horse jesus.
@TheCatWhisprer: Hello Darkness, my old frie- *the lights suddenly turn on* oh it's like that now?