@mikeleffingwell: Last night I slept for 8 hours straight, and then for 2 hours gay.
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@OhNoSheTwitnt: Martin Shkreli has been arrested. Bail will be set, then quickly raised to an amount he can't possible afford.
@TheCatWhisprer: Forgot to use a coupon my wife gave me so now I have to hide it like it's a dead body.
@Samigrl2: "Do what you love & the money will follow." Ate some pizza, harassed a telemarketer, & took a 6 hr nap in my underwear. And now, I wait...