@mikeleffingwell: Last night I slept for 8 hours straight, and then for 2 hours gay.
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@aveuaskew: If all the Domino's employees in the world held hands, you'd have to make your own pizza.
@MissNaughty1801: *on the phone Him: where are you?! Me: I'm just waiting for the train Him: hurry up Me:...no problem. I'll be waiting faster
@aka_fatman: "I finally caught up with my son." "That's good. Progress. How did it go?" "Badly. I cut off his hand THEN told him." - Vader & therapist