@FunnyMojoJojo: Last week I chopped my neighbour's tree and now it's growing back because his-tree repeats itself...
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@shadygrenade: Obama: Get Air Force One ready. Biden: OK! *runs off* Obama: The plane, not the movie. *Biden does 360* Biden: Yeah I know.
@spittingllama_: When a girl tells u about her favorite animal - "I'd eat one" is not the right response.
@KalvinMacleod: GOD: I call this Tupperware SATAN: remember when I let u crash at my place and u said u owed me one G: yes S: make the lid a little smaller