@ImTheSheriff: Laughed so hard tears ran down my leg.
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@simoncholland: I accidentally called it an eternity scarf instead of an infinity scarf and now I have to drink my Starbucks outside.
@BobTheSuit: Adult me must concede that a major contributor to global warming was kid me leaving the front door open and heating the whole goddam world.
@topaz_kell: [taking a picture] Me: "Make love to the camera!" Grandma: "Don't make this weird, dear."