@HollyHeals: Laughter is the best medicine........unless you have Morphine. Then Morphine is the best medicine.
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@robdelaney: Imagine your relief if you had a dream your daughter was dating a DJ then woke up & remembered she was dating a ferris wheel operator.
@UkeOfEarl1: [Working in a hospital] ME: Well, this guy's autopsy is done NURSE: You mean tonsillectomy ME: Uh oh
@stephenjmolloy: Genie: "You have 3 wishes." Ian: "I wish for everyone to be equal." Genie: "Okay. You have no wishes."
@dafloydsta: [couples therapy] HER: His obsession with Star Wars is tearing us apart ME: *covering my Yoda doll's ears* Hear you he can, Karen