@Cryptoterra: learn just enough tap dancing just to tap dance out of the room when you win an argument
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@funnybeachgirl: Just saw a Fiat & a Mini Cooper get into a head on collision. It was horrible... there was glitter everywhere.
@sarcasm_inc: "2015 AND PETSMART STILL DOESN'T HAVE FITTING ROOMS," I say somewhat loudly as Fluffy has to try on sweaters right there in the aisle.
@dire_beard: Snow White: Someday my prince will come Prince Charming: I swear this has never happened before
@Elizasoul80: [trial] Judge: how do you plead? "not guilty" J: but you've admitted to dropping an anvil on him. "he asked me to make him a pancake"