@ipalatsky: Learning how to say "where the hell am I?" in eight languages. Just in case.
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@KalvinMacleod: ME: I’ve been shot MEDIC: put pressure on the wound ME: ok, wound, are you saving for your child’s tuition because education is important
@FauxFawx: *calls 911* Hey, I found some big guns. *Cops surround the house. I come outside flexing and get shot 263 times.*
@Up2Long: Didn't want cats ... had 2 cats. Didn't want marriage ... got married 2 times. Ok Karma ... I'm on to you. I don't want a million dollars
@kumailn: Donald Sterling saying racism is not a problem is like mosquitoes saying malaria is not a problem.