@ipalatsky: Learning how to say "where the hell am I?" in eight languages. Just in case.
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@squirrel74wkgn: [drive-thru at 2am] Whaazzuupp!? Lemme gets 12 tacos, 6 burritos, and a Diet Coke. Booyah! Neighbor's mailbox: ...
@LionJenkins: Her: Babe! Be careful! The stove is hot! Me winking and leaning on the stove: You're Hot, Baby. 911: What's your emergency?
@weinerdog4life: Watched Avatar again and long story short, can you untie my ponytail from this horse?
@MindyFurano: Juicing changed my life. I went from being overweight, to being overweight and owning a juicer.