@Chelsea_Elle: Leaving my browser history open in case anyone in this coffee shop tries to steal my laptop when I'm in the bathroom.
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@EndhooS: I invited Jim for dinner "Jim from church or Jim who travels everywhere by catapult?" [Loud thud on the roof] *sigh* "I'll get the ladders"
@thenoahkinsey: Tried a new flavor from my favorite brand of energy drinks. It was the 2nd grossest taste I've ever had in my mouth. (No offense, Andrea.)
@normwilner: Spider-Man Spider-Man Does whatever a spider can Spins a web Any size Catches thieves Eats those guys Hey wait Don't do that Spider-Man
@Shot_Of_Cabo: (CPR class) Wife to instructor: What if my knees start to hurt? Me to instructor: See what I'm up against?