@DaddyJew: Legend has it that if you don't look a coworker in the eye they won't stop to tell you about their weekend.
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@LouisPeitzman: This is probably going to sound really gay, but the sunset is GORGEOUS right now and I love making out with dudes.
@noog: "What sins have you committed?" Well... [20 minutes later] ... finally fit my whole fist up there. I shit you not. Father? *vomiting sound*
@underfleeker: [LUNCH INTERVIEW] "Our office attire is formal, is that ok?" *I adjust my tie and the little tie on my corndog* Sure.
@jjhartinger: If you're worried that technology will take over remember humans develop technology & we're surprised how hot it is in the summer. Always.