@JaneanPatience: Leonard Cohen is jamming in heaven with Prince now. Really awkwardly. It's not going well. Their musical styles aren't compatible
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@dave_cactus: WAITRESS: Would you like to try a quesadilla? ME: I can barely eat one dilla, let alone a whole case.
@Prof_Hinkley: [After 20 min at your house] I used all your toilet paper "Check in the cabine-" All of it "We have more in the gar-" All of it all of it
@chuuew: TEACHER: Have you got anything for today's palindrome class? STUDENT: dammit I'm mad TEACHER: OK, OK, I'll ask someone else
@BlindChow: WIFE: he never compromises ME: look, Sean Bean is either pronounced Shawn Bonn or Seen Bean it can't be both THERAPIST: (nodding) he's right