@RiddlingDreams: Lesbians should not be allowed to buy dildos, they made their choice!!
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@scottthetwat: Homes are 750 square feet larger today than they were 30 years ago. Unfortunately, so are most Americans.
@LeiaMarieG: My kid's insults to each other: "you have fat lips like Momma." "well, you have a big butt like Momma. Thanks, kids.
@david8hughes: [first day as tour guide in New York] Me: that's the Statue of Liberty Guy: what is she clutching Me [awkward long pause]: all the liberty