@daviddeweil: "Let It Go" performed by Rose and Jack from Titanic. Mostly by Rose, though.
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@hythemafia: Sperm 1: "Geez I'm exhausted, how much further to the Fallopian tubes?" Sperm 2: "A long way, we've just passed the tonsils..."
@beefman138: I will never refer to 'drunk me' or 'sober me' because that implies the second one exists.
@SondraDeeMe: You can tell a lot about my BF by the way he's giving me the silent treatment. He's doing it wrong. I'm doing it right but can't tell him.