@AkashThakan: Let me tell you why going outside is not safe. Because chances are after a few days you end up retweeting a joke about yourself.
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@GrantTanaka: astronauts be acting like they’re so cool, as if we didn’t know at least 60 dogs and monkeys went to space before them
@ericsshadow: ME: I had salmon for lunch. WIFE: the L is silent. ME: Ha, I knew that. I meant unch.
@cogentanalysis: Sorry, guy outside grocery store with a heavy bag and one arm in a sling, but I can't help you. Ted Bundy ruined that for everyone.