@Brianhopecomedy: Let my 4 year old score his first goal on me in hockey & he said, "NA NA, you couldn't stop me!" so he also received his first cross-check.
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@Nahdude83: Got kicked out of the casino again. Apparently, gold chocolate coins mess up their slot machines or something.
@SuicideBooth1: Brain: She's cute, talk to her... Me: but what should I say? Brain: ask her if she likes meat... Me: What? Brain: c'mon man, do it...
@TommyKarate: Local video store is offering a chance to win free iPads, so naturally, I reported them as spam.