@inmynewskin: Let your girlfriend know how much you love her by screeching loudly like a pterodactyl whenever she talks.
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@MAKJ: Me: I’m going to be healthy Breakfast: fruit Lunch: sandwich Dinner: salad Midnight: large pizza, mac & cheese, a gallon of ice cream
@robfee: If it comes down to Joe Biden vs Donald Trump we should just accept our fates & let a chili dog eating contest determine who's president.
@GrumpyBahr: Sorry I haven't tweeted much. Kathy on facebook was keeping us updated on her menstrual cramps.