@NYC_Blonde: Let's all take a moment to honor National Punctuation Day because life would be: very, confusing! Without it?
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@vikkaroni: My nose won't stop running. But, to be fair, it's the only part of my body that's still in shape.
@Rhythms_n_Booze: Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Honestly I'm so shit faced I have no idea.