@Home_Halfway: "Let's do 5 sets of squats & then try lifting for an hour. It looks like you got out of shape after your dad died" ~ Really personal trainer
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@librarianfonz: There are gravy trains and boats. I wonder what gravy did to get on a no-fly list.
@BadJordon: ME [struggling]: skinny jeans, skinny jeans, let me in SCARED DENIM: don't come back till you're thinny, thin, thin
@_SingleBabyMama: So, I'm officially off the market. Got a DM from a faceless Avi proposing marriage in broken English. We're planning a June wedding!
@AristotlesNZ: 5yo: I dropped my damn spoon! Me: Don't be using that word! 5yo: Is it a bad word? Me: It is.. 5yo: Ok..I dropped my damn "food scooper"?