@Tylerosis: Let's do something we both know we'll regret in the morning. Let's order KFC for dinner.
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@UniqueDude2: me: hello darkness my old friend darkness: you are going to hate me but I forgot your name
@TommyWallace: [First date] okay just dont let her know you're a trump supporter Her: so what kinda wine should I get Me: haha white is always the best
@cepheusjackson: [SCIENCE FAIR] ME: It's a Pez dispenser, but for hot Pop-Tarts. PRINCIPAL: This fair is for kids. OTHER PARENT: Shut up, let him finish.
@underchilde: We appreciate the 3 billion guys that signed up for our sex study, but unfortunately we only need five.