@longwall26: Life got you down? Just remember that you will never be as confused and sad as the friends and relatives of the world's first clown.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: What sound do dogs make? 3-year-old: Woof woof. Me: Horses? 3: Neigh. Me: Pigs? 3: Sizzle sizzle. Somebody understands bacon.
@leifromloihi: i was one of the palm trees waving around in the background of every 16 bit game in the 90's so yes random guy you do know me from somewhere
@causticbob: What's the difference between a guy wearing a bullet proof vest and the English football team? The guy would survive the first round.
@IamEnidColeslaw: I do this really cute thing where I yawn right before my girlfriend kisses me so I almost swallow her face