@DanMentos: LIFE HACK: If you want to remember something write it upside down on the back of your underwear waistband. You’ll see it when you’re pooping
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@IamEnidColeslaw: That awkward moment when I tried starting a slow clap in the hospital after my uncle died.
@MrSpoonicorn: *i got to get into bed but theres a walrus in there* *i ask him politely to move* *he wont move* *i have to sleep on the floor & im annoyed*
@NikiWithIssues: He's taking you for granted? Act differently. Do something spontaneous. Spice things up. Sleep with his friend.