@boburnham: Life is always one step forward, two steps back...Then slide to the left...Slide to the right. CRISS CROSS!!!
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@bmarked21: Don't expect me to tweet between 8 & 9 pm because that's when I dress like Madonna for an hour and dance provocatively in front of my pets.
@dorkwing_duck: Me: how long are you gonna sit there picking your nose? I tried to be polite but this is absurd Potato Head: I want to look good on my date