@Thomas_Lull: Life is like a box of condoms. If you don't use one, you never know what you're goin get.
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@DaveWeasel: The words 'selfie' and 'twerk' have been added to the dictionary this year while 'charm' and 'dignity' have been removed.
@ThaJawn: *puts a gun against a magician's back Me and you are going to get all the quarters, from behind all the ears
@jonnysun: *at the movie theater* umm ok the hackers also said theyd do a terror unless u giv me unlimited free popcorn and uh.. also that guys popcorn
@Sassafrantz: Ghosts are pretty cool because they can literally do anything they want, but they choose to hide my keys.