@SamGrittner: Life is like a roller coaster: There are ups & downs, you often feel like vomiting, but in the end there are weird pictures of you for sale.
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@Kyle_Lippert: A young Bruce Wayne falls into a cave full of pugs. He later becomes Pugman and keeps the streets of Gotham clean and downright adorable.
@PinkCamoTO: David Attenborough voice "Amazing. See how the youngest of the species always needs something when the mother is in the bathroom."
@Book_Krazy: OUR KID WAS SOAKING WET WHEN YOU BROUGHT HIM HOME FROM SCHOOL! Me: [water pouring from backseat] Listen, this car pool thing was your idea
@0point5twins: "Boss, I've got a probl-" "There are no such things as problems, only opportunities" "Oh, ok. I've got a serious drinking opportunity"