@topaz_kell: Life is not like a box of chocolates. It's more like not being allowed to leave the table until you finish your brussels sprouts.
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@_PerziaN_: Parents that tell u "it's just a little noise" when their kid cries on a train are the same ones who knock on ur door when the music is loud
@weinerdog4life: Whenever you ride an elevator with other people, it's best not to mention your imaginary friends even if someone is standing on Carl.
@causticbob: Kissing the back of someone's neck is a sensuous thing to do. Unless it's a stranger in a queue in Primark.
@julie2288: 90% of parenting is giving up the last fried cheese stick to your kid and pretending you're OK with it.