@TechnicallyRon: Life is stupid. You can ACCIDENTALLY make a baby but you can't ACCIDENTALLY make a cake.
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@MythicPicnic: I feel bad for my Roomba, so every other day I vacuum while it sits on the couch watching TV and drinking beer.
@amishschool: My office has started random urine testing of employees to detect traces of hope or optimism.
@redherringbear: If you believe you can pass a drug test by drinking large amounts of water, you're just diluting yourself.