@CruisinSoozan: Life starts with everyone cheering when you poop and goes drastically down hill from there.
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@DurtMcHurtt: I love giving a little kid the tongue, and then watching him run to his mother holding the severed tongue I just gave him.
@Matt_the_1st: Cop: do you know why I pulled u over? Me: yeah, I was going like 120 back there Cop:.... Me:.. Cop: sir, your tailamp is out Me:...
@simoncholland: You should be able to make your GPS call you a code name. "Bobcat, in 3.1 miles turn left" "Recalculating, Bobcat, you're going rogue."
@PrettyInCamo11: You know it's time for a pedicure when you can exfoliate one foot with the other one