@BuckyIsotope: “Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there,” we chant. Another agent appears inside the pentagram and screams. The dark lord feasts tonight.
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@AntozWolf: True friendship is when you walk into someone's house, and your WiFi connects automatically..
@SarahFemme: The quickest way to find out the time is to order a beer at breakfast with your mother.
@NicCageMatch: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change & the strength to lift a car over my head. Saving the third wish for later.
@web_supergirl: coworker asked me if I needed a hug and now he doesn't work here because people that are on fire can't work.