@karenphotog: Like my grandma always says... put more booze in the mashed potatoes
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@BlindChow: "Shotgun!" I yell as I push past the others and climb into the seat. I am subsequently escorted from the airplane.
@Be___Dope: Her: baby can you come up here and play with me? Me: *sprints up stairs Her: I'm kidding. Can you hand me the remote? Me: this is so us
@sixfootcandy: If you don't know me, don't judge me. Unless you're making me a pizza and you say "This woman looks like she wants extra cheese.” That's ok