@mattZillaaaa: LinkedIn is a terrible dating site
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@KKAlThani: Somewhere right now, a girl just uploaded a picture of herself saying "Not looking good today" after deleting the first 50 pictures she took
@RocketRankoon: I'm not afraid to run into an ex here. Her tweets would be all lame like 'my dog is cute' and mine would be all cool like 'I love you Susan'