@ieatanddrink: Listen buddy, I never said they were for sale. I just put the "FRESH EGGS" sign in my yard to brag
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@myles_morrison: I can tell everything I need to know about your business by the thickness of your bathroom toilet paper.
@jwoodham: Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you've got 5 more rounds in the chamber. You'll get that moon eventually. He'll pay for what he did.
@LoriLuvsShoes: My biggest regret of 2014? Probably when my husband watched "The Notebook" with me and then I yelled at him for not building me a house
@NYC_Blonde: The only difference between you and Harry Potter is that his magic wand actually works OOOOHHH BURRRRN