@Parkerlawyer: Listening to my husband's gorilla snoring and contemplating if I could record it and sell to the FBI as an alternative to waterboarding.
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@Cheeseboy22: I hope at the end of the movie, Batman and Superman have to sit down and write a list of all the things they appreciate about each other.
@KeetPotato: me: "why was she called the little mermaid, she was 5ft7?" therapist: "i meant anything bothering you about your marriage keith"