@Parkerlawyer: Listening to my husband's gorilla snoring and contemplating if I could record it and sell to the FBI as an alternative to waterboarding.
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@ItsLaTourette: When you say '' friends with benefits'' I assume you own a medical Marijuana dispensary and or a liquor store
@JimmerThatisAll: It's raining men because the aliens are returning the abductees in the most compelling way possible.
@dubstep4dads: i bet the first guy to say "smooth as a babies bottom" wasnt the most respected man in the community