@valerie_tosi: Little known fact: Arizona's state flower is pavement.
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@CantWaitToNap: Never have I ever... rushed out of my house pretending I had to be somewhere & drove around neighborhood to get somebody to leave.
@AbrasiveGhost: What did u do last night? Me: I drowned my swallows in whiskey Don't u mean sorrows? Me [covering tub of dead birds]: is that the saying?
@truegritrumble: BOSS: I hate "yes men." ME: Yeah. Me too. BOSS: I like employees who speak their mind. ME: Yeah. They're the best. BOSS: You get me. ME: Yep
@ambamthankyamam: Send prayers. Laura on Facebook didn't realize she was out of syrup until AFTER the pancakes were made! It's causing quite a stir...