@KKAlThani: Look, I might not take a bullet for you but I'd push someone else in front of you which is practically the same thing.
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@SocialExtortion: I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend. Seriously, I'm taking a selfie and you're in the background
@TySmithdrums: Me: "Can I see the baby?" Sister: "Yes, but only if she's awake." Me, through a megaphone: "NOT A PROBLEM."
@david8hughes: [pinned down by sniper fire] Squad leader: I'm going in. Hughes, lay down some cover for me Me [putting a blanket on the floor]: you betcha
@BlackCatBettie: You and I share a very special connection. *I'm parked outside your house using your Wi-fi.