@wickedsuga: Look, if all you have is candy corn in this van, I'm going to have to get out.
@Ideal_Victoria: All of my horoscopes lately have started with “Ok, don’t freak out but…”
@jenstatsky: Hey, pens at the bank: cool it with the chains. You are literally last on my list of things I'd like to steal from a bank.
@FrizerkaSandra: The only real importance in life is getting ahead.
Head. I meant to say head.
@patrickmarkryan: "Wanna go camping?" "No thanks, I have a house."
@IamEveryDayPpl: *enters contest*
Contest: "Wrong hole."