@mzeld: Look ma no friends
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@weedhitler: THIS IS THE COPS. WE KNOW YOU HAVE NWA'S "FU*CK THE POLICE" ON REPEAT IN THERE. COME OUT & SAY SORRY TO OFFICER DAVIS. YOU MADE HIM CRY DUDE
@cbdoubleu: Wife: I lost my day planner. Me: Not in your briefcase? W: No. I looked EVERYWHERE. M: Well it looks like you've got a hidden agenda W:
@kevinrowe1: Take it from me. Your wife will not like it if you say, "My twitter girls would do that"
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Keep your friends close and your unattractive enemies closer so you look better by comparison in pictures.