@deathoftheparty: lookin for a quick and easy way to beef up that scrawny bod and really turn some heads at the beach? float dead in a lake
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@jonnysun: "911 wats ur emergency" hi-- huh? um-- so, uh-- ah. oh geez. well im only just now realizimg that the girl at the bar gave me a fake number
@Donna_McCoy: Welcome to Passive Aggressive Club. We all got here early, but you just take your time.
@PellMull: Everyone is unique. Except you. You are not unique. You are the only not unique person in human history.
@AbrasiveGhost: ME: What's this bit here? NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your résumé said you were a surgeon ME: My résumé says a lot of things