@briangaar: Looking at the smoldering corpses of his enemies, Harry Potter thought "damn magic is dope as hell." #LastLinesFromGreatBooks
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@tigersgoroooar: Yesterday CNN reported that "sitting will kill you, even if you exercise" and I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but living will kill you.
@KatieBurnett: Never seen anyone in Nandos or McDonald's pick up an appropriate amount of napkins - you're cleaning up after a burger not a double homicide
@SondraDeeMe: Call me crazy, but the last person who did is still in a full body cast, so it's up to you.
@Robert_Beau: The Job Interview: HR: So you are bilingual? Me: Si HR: In your native tongue please. Me: Ooga Booga