@pauvrelapinou: Looking for someone willing to kill a man who has wronged me. Unfortunately I can't pay but would be good exposure for an emerging murderer
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@Shot_Of_Cabo: If you guys don't hear from your sexy lady friend TC today it's because he's spending Father's Day with his family.
@skickwriter: 5 & 8: Mommy, may I wear these boots? Can you find my jeans? Will you brush my hair? Will you tie my shoes? Mommy, why aren't you ready?
@TomTheWicked: Facebook: "Do you want to tag Jennifer in this Picture?" Me: Hmmmm. does it make her look fat? Then yes, yes I do.
@smilely_gal: If you drive a Hummer, I will assume you are a douchebag. If aforementioned Hummer is bright yellow, I will crown you their king.