@Tammy2Tone: Looks like Brenda in Accounting drew on her angry eyebrows today...
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@AaronMichael_: Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
@BuckyIsotope: *watches TV* GET AN ANONYMOUS ONLINE QUOTE NOW! *logs on* "You're a giant idiot and your parents are very disappointed in you" - Anonymous
@markleggett: Whenever a woman tells me that she just wants to have a good time and sleep with me, I say "You can only pick one."
@XplodingUnicorn: Daycare lady: *notices 3-year-old's shirt is on backward* It's cute how you let her dress herself. Me: Yes. She did that.