@imOverlyManly: Loses house keys. Builds new house.
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@TheMichaelRock: We could completely eliminate car thefts by making every car alarm sound like Hillary Clinton's laugh.
@TheCiscoKidder: Choose your pet name wisely because you'll be yelling it out in your neighborhood if you lose them. *uses falsetto voice* MR. SMOOCHES!!
@ibid78: I have batlike reflexes. -You mean catlike reflexes? *screeches real loud right in your face to locate food and avoid obstacles*
@ericsshadow: If Donald Trump becomes President, The rest of us should be able to just walk into any hospital & start working as doctors