@inmynewskin: Losing weight to be attractive is weird. I see you shrunk your body slightly. Now I want you.
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@WilliamAder: My Twitter clique is basically five or six people who have mistaken me for someone else.
@RamblingMachine: I hate it when crazy people say Poseidon told them they are the ninja turtles and I don't even remember I told them so.
@MikeCanRant: There is no law that says you can't smoke celery inside public places. What are they gonna do? Ask you to extinguish your celery? Doubtful.